Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Spiritual Development and Writing

CORRECTION "Tell-All Exposé" is next Tuesday the 29th. As for my interview Friday the 25th, info is as follows:

This Friday 9-25 I interview at Day By Day Writer with Samantha Clark. The interview focuses on how Original Faith took shape, including the effects of meditation and the impact of illness and disability as well as the creative process and my writing routine.

Next Tuesday 9-29 I interview at Writers Inspired with Mary Jo Campbell. Mary Jo’s line of questioning leads me to “tell all” – about where I’m at today on writing and faith and on the topics of trade publishing and self publishing. For those of you interested in writing as well as spirituality, this is a guest post that may contain information you can use, and I’ll be happy to answer follow up questions that anyone may have in Mary Jo’s comments thread. Not till Tuesday though. Meanwhile…

Writing as Spiritual Exploration

On the Hand, There’s Content, but then…

It happens that I’ve mostly written in the religion and spirituality area. Since that was my subject, naturally the time that I spent at my writing desk had a spiritual focus.

I’ll add that it really was a desk - or, more precisely, a large table. Most of my work on Original Faith and most of my poetry was written from the early eighties through the mid-nineties, pre-computer, at which point I was derailed for ten years by the onset of a rare progressive disease while continuing to work full time and all that this entailed.

There’s Also Process…

Yet it seems to me that independently of my subject matter, there were certain features to the writing process itself that made it an activity conducive to my spiritual growth and well being.

Practical Life Priorities and Organization - Perhaps especially because I was writing while holding down a career, writing made me streamline my life in ways that were helpful. I had to set priorities and boundaries around areas like my social life and time spent on entertainment.

The Things That Matter – Writing helped me see more clearly what kinds of experiences held most meaning for me. I especially noticed this with my journal. I found myself steering clear of the “Dear Diary” approach. That would have forced me to make entries that I would have found boring myself!

I don't mean to cast aspersions on the logging/dear diary approaches of others – I can see this working in some lives or during certain periods of a person’s life. For example, one of my uncles kept a diary while serving in WWII. But personally, I found that experiences meaningful enough to serve as fodder for my creative writing occurred to me on their own and from time to time and not on any schedule that I could set.

Reflective Time – Writing is a thoughtful, reflective process that qualifies as quality time alone with yourself. It’s relaxing at a number of levels. There’s a sense of space and unhurriedness that comes with having carved out dedicated blocks of time for writing.

I even recall my sensory enjoyment around using the “tools of the trade,” which for me back then included number two pencils, a good quality eraser, and paperweights that were mostly stones I’d picked up at the beach. Over the long run, writing leaves you open to wonderful experiences and insights that you might not have known otherwise.

Ego-Editing – When I first started writing, I used to have a high opinion of almost everything I wrote right after writing it. But then, when I’d have some reason to refer back to it some weeks or months later, my reaction was often, “Ugh…”

Over the years I was able to spot my self-indulgent writing more and more readily – it would take maybe two days for me to notice that something was bad. Eventually, I pretty much stopped writing junk at all.

I'll bet there’s a high correlation between low-quality writing and coming at it from an egotistical place – trying to be new, different, clever, showcase one’s sensitivity, profundity, logical abilities – whatever… To become increasingly adept at self editing and to eventually truly lose your taste and enthusiasm for the written products of your own ego – that’s personal growth!

What has your experience of writing been, especially in relation to your inner life and personal development?

15 Comments:

Blogger tuti said...
writing my morbid thoughts has saved me many times from acting out my morbid thoughts, lol.
i must learn too to siphon off 'junk' writing or 'ego-editing' as you call it. that in itself is already a positive step for me towards .. positive living?!!

i will hop by samantha clark's on friday. looking forward.
10:48 PM  

Blogger SusieQ said...
I know what you mean about the ego and writing. Years ago I took a creative writing course at a local college. One of the pieces I wrote for the class was a poem about my spiritual life at that time and what I was feeling down inside. This poem came from the purest, most sincere part of myself. As I wrote it, I was deeply emotional. I remember how the tears streamed down my face.

I was working through some spiritual stuff as I wrote this poem. Insight gained from writing? Perhaps. In the last few lines, I resolved the spiritual issue that troubled me and the poem came to an end.

It was a long poem written in simple words. It contained some very good symbolism that I was not even aware I was using. I never went back to change a single word of this poem. To have done so would have been egotistical of me. I think you can agree.

This poem brought me many kudos from my teacher and my classmates who crowded around me wanting to know how I had managed to write something that good and not change a word of it. All I could tell them was that it had come from my heart.

Now for the rest of the story. I got so puffed up with pride after all those kudos, my ego had been so massaged by everyone in that class, that for a long time afterwards everything I wrote turned out to be junk. (smile...)
11:53 PM  

Blogger crystal said...
I used to write fiction short stories and have some posted in another blog but haven't done so for a few years. It was very emotionally involving and I put a lot of my self into it. It's very different to write blog posts.
4:04 AM  

Anonymous Ian | Quantum Learning said...
I started writing my blog about a year ago and I certainly found (and still do) it a great way to reach clarity on many things that were unclear to me. It's one thing to reflect or talk to someone and quite another to write for a public audience. Writing needs to me to think more deeply and put it in some kind of order (that's my style, anyway).

I've found it incredibly helpful in my evolution as I try to make sense of the world and my place in it.

I like the idea of ego checking and I'm sure a few of my articles wouldn't pass the ego test! Just off to reread them now...
7:49 AM  

Blogger Paul said...
Tuti – I can see that… More broadly, you raise the important point that people do all kinds of writing for all kinds of reasons. In my post I was thinking specifically of creative writing. I never did that until age 23, although previously I’d done plenty of writing…

SusieQ – I can see how all that could happen! I bet lots of people can relate to it. Must be interesting to be a creative writing teacher and see these occasional really nice works from students.

Crystal and Ian – I’ve wondered about blogging and didn’t go into that because my major creative years happened prior to my blogging – so I don’t really know how that would have worked for me.

I started blogging shortly after becoming completely housebound and in considerable continuous physical pain and discomfort. I’ve found that I’ve done very little creative writing since then because for me, creativity drew much more from my present lived experience than my remembered past.

So Crystal, for me too, writing blog posts has been very different from creative writing – but I’m not sure how much that’s due to my situation and how much it’s the medium. Posting for me has just been a matter of writing clear expository prose. When I have posted genuinely creative writing, it’s almost always been something written years earlier.

Ian – me too – on how writing makes you think more deeply and clearly. My hunch is that if blogging had been available to me during my major creative years, I would have needed time and privacy to work on my most creative stuff, so I probably would have been both blogging and working my best things out offline.

On the ego and blogging... For me, the biggest challenge there has been on comments threads when you’re dealing with a disagreeable person. That’s been rare, but I found at first that I’d sometimes get “hooked” and start to get into a back and forth that was pointless.
11:26 AM  

Blogger raymond said...
Nice subject Paul. I just finished a book that still has plenty of that ego-centered junk in it. But I do take pride :-) in having removed tons of it before I sent it to the printer's. Next time maybe I will do better. And there is actually some pretty good stuff in the book besides my ego's numerous pets.
1:06 PM  

Blogger Paul said...
Raymond - Sounds interesting from your "About Me" when I click on the link from your name here - also your life...!
1:57 PM  

Blogger Pauline said...
One of my writing teachers called that ego-editing you refer to as "killing your darlings." Almost always, one's writing is better for it.

It takes effort to weed out and discard even a single sentence you're inordinately proud of, never mind whole sections. I almost always let things "sit" for a bit. It's easier to delete when you yourself think, "ugh."

As for spiritual development while writing, I would guess a lot depends (as you say) on the subject matter. I can better trace my leanings one way or another through my personal journals but most of my published writing has little to do with spirituality. Now and then, though, I come across a piece I've written that asks serious questions or makes observations that catch me by surprise; a true "I said that?" moment.
7:42 PM  

Blogger Paul said...
Pauline - "It takes effort to weed out and discard even a single sentence you're inordinately proud of, never mind whole sections." You're reminding of another order of learning to "kill your darlings" that I didn't discover till writing my book.

I found that I needed to eliminate some material that I really liked in itself but for one reason or another just didn't help move the overall text along. So my later edits often meant asking, "OK, so I like this... but is it more of a help or a distraction to what I'm trying to do overall?"
8:00 PM  

Anonymous Kaushik said...
Hi Paul,

I write about Awareness, over the mind and ego, and a commenter asked me if there wasn't thinking involved in my writing.

As you say, when the ego is involved in the writing, it doesn't feel authentic; when it's from awareness, it flows. The more I write the more it flows from Awareness. Perhaps that is the value of writing as a spiritual exploration.

Great post--thanks for insights; my experience with writing is very similar to yours.

k
3:47 PM  

Anonymous Lisa (Mommy Mystic) said...
Writing has been a big theme for me. I actually only started writing in the last couple of years, and before this I considered myself a 'bad writer'. I had this feeling that I needed to develop this aspect of myself, and committed to writing more often. I have never been a journaller and still am not - I write almost exclusively on my blog and at BellaOnline at the moment. And I can see it has totally transformed my own relationship to my spirituality and journey. I have had to step outside myself to understand the way I think vs. the way others do. I also have had to learn to quiet down my hyper-analystical tendencies and try to let some 'grace' come through. It is a constant learning process for me - I can relate to what you call 'ego-writing' here, definitely. I think this realm is where a lot of my own self-understanding is unfolding right now.
8:53 PM  

Blogger Paul said...
Kaushik – Does sound similar. On a side note, it’s interesting for me to find what looks like your schematization of Awareness, mind and ego. I guess the first phenomenological schematization (now that’s hard to say…) I ever ran into was Freud’s ego, superego and id. I have my way of apportioning things too. Seems like the most compelling mind-diagram would be one that would account for all aspects of phenomenology with each element of the schematic as free from overlap from the others as possible.

Lisa – Hyper-analytical tendencies? I just can’t relate to that. Now being meta-analytical is an ENTIRELY different matter… (See my reply to Kaushik above.)

Wow… it’s hard for me to imagine developing my writing online. I can see where the pressure would be on to write well and how that would work. But for me, writing in the early Paleolithic era, it felt like I really needed the privacy.
10:58 PM  

Blogger doshar said...
hi paul... off topic... how are you? congratulations on your book! as for the interviews, i hope you can link them here afterwards if that is possible. i have been largely absent from the blogosphere this last year, i am not disciplined enough i guess to stay committed i guess. but i really do miss it. and this is where any writing i do gets done. the problem with writing i think,.... is i feel it needs alot of space... time and mental... to right something worthwhile. i do not know how columnists come up with something on a daily basis. you just need a lot of space.... i get these sporadics thoughts in my head... in my car.. or something... i would think i want to write them down... and then i never get around to doing it. our world is too busy i think and distracting to let one sit and enjoy their own thoughts... not to mention writing them down. i do hope i get the mental space to do it again though... it is very healthy ... and for a while it helped me through a time i thought i was going to lose my mind.


i will try to drop often some more. best of luck to you always.
8:16 AM  

Blogger Paul said...
Hi Doshar, thanks and good to see you again. The colored/underlined words in the post are links, and by the date indicated you can just click the link for the guest post. So for example the first one is already up.

Glad you haven't taken your blog down. Even if you haven't been able to be so active, it's always there to post to once in a while or maybe get back to regularly down the road. You're still on my roll under the "More Blogs" link --
10:20 AM  

Anonymous Kaushik said...
Paul, there isn't a hard schematization. We use these words to point to something. Mind is thought, emotion, and ego. Ego is a bunch of thoughts--belief. Awareness is the constant which is aware of mind and everything else. Mind can be quieted, thoughts can diminish, emotions can be released, the ego can be seen through...Awareness just always is.
11:53 PM  

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